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The average stepfamily takes five to seven years to combine; some take longer. (Read more about how to cook a stepfamily here.) 4.Realize that the "honeymoon" comes at the end of the journey for remarried couples, not the beginning.Biological parents must keep alive their role as primary disciplinarian and nurturer while supporting the stepparent’s developing role (read this series of articles for more on stepparenting). Tell them: Work smarter, not harder For stepfamilies, accidentally finding their way through the wilderness to the promised land is a rarity.
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’ Yes, well, that’s because you were with your boy.” Dating for two is difficult; dating in a crowd is downright complicated.
The kids are engaged, at least on some level, even when you don’t think they are.
Young children can attach themselves to a future stepparent rather quickly, so make sure you’re serious before spending lots of time together. Most people think the way to cook a stepfamily is with a blender, microwave, pressure cooker, or food processor. All of these "cooking styles" attempt to combine the family ingredients in a rapid fashion.
Older children will need more time (research suggests that the best time to remarry is before a child’s tenth birthday or after his/her sixteenth; couples who marry between those years collide with the teen's developmental needs). Unfortunately, resentment and frustration are the only results. Once thrown into the pot, it will take time and low heat to bring ingredients together, requiring that adults step into a new marriage with determination and patience.
It’s a good fantasy, but stepparents won’t care for your children to the same degree that you do.